ALWAYS
BE
CHOMPING
Eat the leads. Close the contracts. Dodge everything your pipeline throws at you.
alwaysbechomping.co.uk
Meet Oscar.
Oscar is a golden octopus with eight arms, zero patience for cold leads, and an inexplicable passion for closing contracts. He lives on our office desk. He wears an orange cap. He is, inexplicably, our mascot.
One day we asked ourselves: what if Oscar could actually eat the pipeline? What if budget cuts, legal reviews and the competition were things he could dodge? What if the whole messy chaos of B2B marketing was a game?
Always Be Chomping is that game. Made by the team at Catalyst, played by anyone who's ever sat in a meeting and wondered if they could just eat the problem instead.
Play now — no download, no login
How to play
Simple rules.
Brutal pipeline.
Controls
Desktop
WASD or arrow keys to move Oscar around the reef.
Mobile
Touch and drag anywhere on screen. Oscar follows your finger.
Scoring
Level score
Resets to zero at the start of each level. Eating fish adds points. Hazards deduct points. If it goes below zero you lose a life.
Total score
Your running bank across all levels. When you complete a level, your level score gets added to the total. Hazards never touch it.
Lives
You start with 3 lives. Lose a life when your level score goes below zero. Score resets to zero and you carry on. All three gone — game over.
The leads — eat these
| Lead | Points | Size | What to know |
|---|---|---|---|
| Cold Lead | +10 | Tiny | Everywhere. Easy points. Not worth chasing but grab them if they swim past. |
| Warm Lead | +25 | Medium | Common. Worth a short detour. |
| Hot Prospect | +50 | Large | Less frequent. Moves faster. Worth going for. |
| Qualified Lead | +75 | Big, glowing | Rare and gold. The shark wants it too. Get there first. |
Things to aim for
Signed Contract
Hit the level score threshold and a glowing gold contract appears on screen. Swim through it to complete the level and bank your score.
The Whale
Rare. Glides slowly across the screen. Swim into it for a bonus of 100 x your current level. Level 5? That is 500 points. Do not miss it.
Hazards — these cost you points
Hazards deduct from your level score only. Your total score is always safe. Damage scales up every level — by level 5 a shark hit hurts. A lot.
Spear — Budget Cut
Appears Level 1 -75 pts — scales up with levelsFast and straight. Travels diagonally across the screen. Arrives without warning. Much like an email from finance at the end of Q3.
Net — Legal Review
Appears Level 2 -50 pts — scales up with levelsSlow, large and wavy. Drifts across the screen. Doesn't move fast — just takes up a lot of space and gets in the way of everything.
Shark — The Competition
Appears Level 3 -100 pts — scales up with levelsHunts you for a few seconds then breaks off to steal your best leads instead. Rude. Effective. Exactly like your main competitor.
Crab — Scope Creep
Appears Level 4 -60 pts — scales up with levelsCharges at you with claws snapping then loses its nerve and scuttles off. Comes back. Charges again. A perfect metaphor for a stakeholder who keeps changing the brief.
Anemone — Algorithm Change
Appears Level 5 -40 pts — scales up with levelsPulsing multicolour nightmare. Touch it and your controls invert for 3 seconds. Left becomes right. Up becomes down. Your brand guidelines become someone else’s mood board.
The levels
The Shallows
Bright tropical reef. Spears only. Ease in.
The Tidal Zone
Teal depths. Nets join the party.
The Deep
Dark purple. The shark arrives and it wants your leads.
Volcanic Vent
Near-black lava glow. The crab appears.
The Abyss
Bioluminescent dark. Anemone joins in. Controls will scramble.
The Void
All five hazards. Full speed. Pitch black. Just survival.
Global rankings
Who's eating?
Sign up below to claim your spot and get notified when new levels drop.
Join the leaderboard
Think you can beat Oscar?
Sign up and we will let you know when new levels and challenges drop. No spam. Just chomping.
Your marketing shouldn't feel like
dodging budget cuts underwater.
Always Be Chomping is a game. But the chaos it parodies is very real. If your marketing feels like Oscar — good instincts, no backup, constantly outrun by things that shouldn't exist — we should talk.